Feeling a little low in the dumps. Blame it on Monday blues. They always block my logical thinking from flowing through. Today a teacher aid who somehow has taken a liking towards me since she joined a month back said that I have a very nice face and gave my cheeks a brush. A middle age lady who already has grown up children up and down my age, just in case any imagination run while. It was a motherly touch kind of thing. She would always greet me in the morning with the prefects and would in front of them, compliment me on my smile "Miss Diva has a nice smile to go with her diva-ish name!" is what she would say when I enter the gates. Just the boost I need everyday.Nothing different today except she complimented me on my face - more like my cheeks.And so I was extra happy. "Yeah! I have a nice face" I thought to myself. But it did not last for long.There is this annoying guy who just joined my school. I have nick named him The Hulk Hogan, the reason is explained in the name itself. A bulky guy of 24 years of age.He irritates the freaking s**** out of me every other day, never failing to comment on my size whenever he is giving advice on exercising to the other female teachers. He is the CCA coordinator for the school and was a personal trainer before this. He too just joined the school a month back. ARGH! I wish I could just flush him down the toilet bowl. He joined my fellow colleagues and I for lunch today and got my goat when he started on how he likes a few of the teacher because of their "hot" bodies and ya da ya da ya da to cut the long story short, went on to praise the other younger teacher about her looks, her height and so on right in front of me! AND he asked her out for a dance in the upcoming school's D&D! Like hello!!!!!! I mean the other two at the table was a male teacher who is within my age group and an older lady of about 30 plus but me? I mean not that I want to go dancing with Mr Muscle Man YUCK! It is just that I thought it was quite hurting because I felt really awkward as he started listing names of all the teachers and how he has gone around finding their details and even listed that fellow colleague's age and relationship status etc and he did not even bother to like acknowledge my presence when half the FREAKING population of young HOT teachers were mentioned. and NO I am not exaggerating the numbers. I swear.I mean, am I really that ugly? because this is not the first time a guy has ever done this. The only time I ever get compliments for my looks is from AUNTYS. And they all have one thing in common. My stupid cheeks! ARGH! Why am I feeling so affected ? because it made me think back to so many things and it just clicked. How my circle of friends will have a "chio" one who always gets the guys while I will some how be singled out. How when we go out as a group or a pair and when a guy sneaks a glance, that girl can so confidently say she is the one who is being checked out.Why can't it be that the guy was checking me out? See? It shows that I must be really that horrendous looking. I am so irritated. I feel like an elephant is trapped inside my body.I detest being fat.ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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