I realised I forgot to write my Three Things To Be Thankful For after reading my sister's blog so here goes:
1) yes, I had a great time doing my hair with my mum and sis last thursday and it was indeed a time for bonding. Something we have not done in ages.

2) solitude. It gives me space to further explore myself, though i am feeling a teeny bit lonely.

3) I cannot seem to express this point in short so I am just going to put it in plain words. I realised these past weeks that though i did have friends who really cared for me, there were some i discovered, that no matter how much i try, i cannot seem to shake out any form of negative feelings Towards them. I feel jealousy, irritation when they give me a good news but of course, that is not the case for all.

For e.g. If my best friend was to tell me she sturck lottery today, i would be very happy foor her. 100 per cent. But when best friend B is to come and give me the same news, my reaction will be the exact opposite. The happiness I show would not be what I am actually feeling and as idiotic as it sounds, it is jealousy or pure irritation. Something that just sprouts out like wild mushrooms on a rainy day. With no warning. I told my sister about it. How i am always comparing my reactions to situations with person A and B and realised with B, there is just something wrong with me. All i can say is, i am thankful i realised it now so that i dont have to go on being fake when i know i hate it and though B is a good person, B always brings out the ugly in me and thus i have made up my mind to end it once and for all because it has been years and alot has dawned on me this past days.

Maybe, i have misinterpreted the actions or misread the emotions but for now, it is me first and i really dont like it. There is just something about the way she says and do things that get on my wrong end. No one has yet to step on that zone. Ahh..the words are not coming out properly but heck, as long as I understand. Plus, no signs of her existance for awhile so yea, it makes it abit easier.

so yup, the long winded negative thing I am thankful for.