Ok,I have landed back on earth.Reality is slowly seeping in.What am I doing?Or should I say thinking?Heyloo..I don't know head or tail of him and can still like him? First thing first.I applaud myself for keeping it all inside for 7 years.

Whats wrong with me? How do you even like a person without knowing anything ? How does it start off? Like there has to be something right? Besides the character.

I know one thing is for sure.It is not the looks.Its something in him.Ahh..Shit..I so cannot stand this.It all started with that stupid entry of mine.Had I not wrote it,I would not have dug out all this hidden feelings and messed my head up once again.Reshapl asked me what would I do if he was attatched,I easily said "nothing lah,what is there to do?" but the answer did not feel right. She knew it too.So what would I do when someone I hardly know but happens to be P's friend and also someone I kept seeing in the bus is attatched?I don't know.It sounds so silly to be even affected by it.

I amaze myself alot sometimes.Really do.Sometimes,I wonder why my feelings for guys are always so weird.Like am I abnormal or what?Or am I just thinking too much and whatever it is that I feel towards them is actually normal but I am just over reacting.

I didnt know liking a person can be so torturous.All that roller coaster of emotions.One minute you feel happy just thinking about the person and the next,you can be emoing about how silly it all seems.Is it me or does it happen to everyone else? Again, I do not know and that is because I don't talk to people about this.Nope.No one has yet to successfully make me open my mouth and talk it through without any hesitation or embarrasment.Don't ask me why is it so difficult to open my mouth and talk.Because,again,I do not know why.I just dont like the thought f people seeing that whole vulnerable side of me.That whole I-am-in-love mushy side of me.Yucks! The thought of it already makes me want to puke.

Silly as it sounds, I guess that is the reason.Vulnerability.Exposing your feelings just make you so vulnerable,to me,that is how I feel.Once again,don't ask.Haiz,you know what? Ask me.Get me really drunk and ask me anything.I will tell.

I am so choked up inside,I think a sewers pipe is even cleaner.Someone,anyone, if you read this,help me out of this.Hahaha..teach me to express my thoughts and I will reward you with...hmm?Negotiations can be done.haha..

Adieu!

note to self: Till you get further details,there is still a silver lining.Postivity.Remember that. =)